Chris! Oh, Chris!

My love affair with Chris Walken continues...and he should know I'm single now...Chris if you're reading this...call me;) so here is my newest thing to add to the other things I have realting to this blog. I am also including another photo that I know Alison will greatly appreaciate.

--Courteney

Tomorrow In Japan

some things aren't right in this cuz blogger sucks for posting poems...but w/e.
Tomorrow In Japan--A Poem By Courteney G. Malek

I follow you, my love,
can I catch your heart?
I am
489 days
behind…in spirit and in mind.

Yesterday: you say you love me and
I am addicted,
more love! more happy, happy love!

my life (so many tears…)
your life (so much laughter…)
together (we smile.)
but now, I laugh too…
this change has thrown us
off balance.

I am different
…I have not changed
I have progressed…
all I needed was a reason:
I will no longer be full of anxiety
nor will I let trouble harass me.

you helped me find reason.
in more ways than one.
I did not try to change for you,
I tried to change because of you.

489 days make you wiser.
I look to you--to guide me, to help me--
because I love you,
simply because I do.
I could list one thousand reasons
and still I would not have explained it.

then you are angry.
I am confused.
489 days…mean you can do no wrong?
I let it pass,
simply because I do.
I could try to ask you questions
and still I would not understand.

Today: I wish you would (could?)
adore me, think of me, need me, want me!
more love! more happy, happy love!

I am afraid.
You wish that I was not.
I may be afraid, but at least I don’t lie.
if I’m going to be afraid,
I want it to be…
with you.

you will not leave me,
yet.
you have a hard time breaking
promises.
it’s funny how easy it was to break
my heart.

Tomorrow: you will say things
that I am not sure you believe.
more love? more happy, happy love?

in 7 short words
“us” is broken
and soon they’ll all see
we can’t.

you will not give me your
tomorrows.
you do not want me anymore.
soon--you will not love me anymore.
and as you find someone new,
we will gain…
another faded friendship.

I do not need
tomorrows.
I’d be content with
todays.

Now: I see you do not
adore me, think of me, need me, want me!
no more love! no more happy, happy love!

you have no todays to give to me
or, and this I can only hope, anyone else.
your last today was 1176 hours ago:

it’s always tomorrow in Japan.